How to Deal With a Husband Who Thinks He Does Nothing Wrong (2024)

How to Deal With a Husband Who Thinks He Does Nothing Wrong (1)

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It can be frustrating when you come to feel, “My husband thinks he does nothing wrong.”

Being in a relationship with someone who is never wrong can lead you to feel as if you cannot express your feelings, and you may even perceive that you don’t matter in the relationship.

Learn how to identify the signs that your husband thinks he does nothing wrong, as well as ways you can cope when a husband says he can’t do anything wrong.

Why does a person think he can do nothing wrong?

It may come as no surprise that research also shows that perfectionism is linked to lower relationship satisfaction. If you are struggling with the thought that my husband thinks he does nothing wrong, there is no wonder that you may be looking for solutions.

There are reasons behind the never wrong personality in relationships.

  • In some cases, when you notice my husband thinks he does nothing wrong, he might also be a bit of a perfectionist. This means he expects himself to be perfect and is highly self-critical.

Someone who is a perfectionist may struggle with a never wrong personality because being wrong would suggest they are no longer perfect. When someone’s entire self-esteem is based upon perfectionism, being wrong can be a threat to their identity.

  • Perhaps the main reason behind my husband thinks he does nothing wrong is the need to defend himself. Quite simply, the need to be right at all times is a defense mechanism. If your husband says he can’t do anything wrong, he is defending against his own vulnerabilities and imperfections.
  • Ultimately, if you feel my husband acts like he thinks he knows everything, he may not even be aware of this.
  • He may be subconsciously trying to cover up his own insecurities, shame, or unpleasant emotions by trying to be right all the time.
  • Underlying the never-wrong personality is low self-esteem and the fear that he will be seen as weak or inherently flawed if he admits to being wrong.
  • Keep in mind that in order for someone to become so opposed to the idea of never being wrong, they have probably experienced some sort of intense pain or rejection in the past.

Perhaps they were punished for sharing emotions as a child, or maybe their parents expected perfection and withheld love in its absence.

Whatever the case, know that if you catch yourself thinking, “What is wrong with my husband?” chances are that he developed the defense mechanism of never being wrong at a rather young age in order to protect himself because he learned that being vulnerable would result in criticism or punishment.

5 Factors that may lead to a never-wrong personality

As previously mentioned, childhood rejection can lead to insecurities that make a person feel they can never be wrong. Some other factors that can lead to the never wrong personality are as follows:

  1. Lack of praise or recognition as a child
  2. Feeling unvalued by a partner or in the workplace
  3. Some sort of unmet need in his life
  4. Learning from growing up with a parent who always had to be right
  5. Low self-esteem arising from childhood issues

Regardless of the specific cause, there are several underlying issues that lead a person to become someone who is never wrong.

Remember, no matter what the cause is, always being right is a defense mechanism. Admitting to imperfection would mean coming face to face with insecurities, fears, or other parts of the self that are too painful to face.

Also Try: What Is Wrong with My Husband Quiz

15 signs of a husband who thinks he does nothing wrong

If you have noticed that your husband thinks he is always right, you may be looking for some signs that may suggest your observations are correct.

Consider the following 15 signs of a husband who is never wrong:

  • He blames you for everything that goes wrong

How to Deal With a Husband Who Thinks He Does Nothing Wrong (2)

If your husband thinks he is always right, he certainly won’t be to blame when things go wrong. This means that if there is some sort of problem, he may place the blame on you because taking any fault would require him to admit to imperfection on his part.

  • He has to “win” arguments

If you are someone who feels my husband thinks he knows everything, you will probably notice that he always has to have the last word in arguments.

For the never wrong personality, an argument is not an opportunity to compromise or resolve conflict, but rather a time to win and show that he is right.

  • He projects his emotions onto you

Projection occurs when we feel a certain way and attribute that feeling to someone else because we don’t want to accept the feeling.

For instance, if your husband is anxious about work and you ask him what is wrong, he may project his anxiety onto you and ask why you are so worried all the time.

Someone who is never wrong struggles to be vulnerable enough to accept their own painful emotions so that projection may be necessary.

  • He gets upset when you get emotional after he hurts you

When someone has a perfectionist mindset and a need to be right all the time, it will be difficult to accept responsibility for hurting another person.

This means that if you are in a situation where my husband thinks he does nothing wrong, he will probably not want to admit that your hurt feelings are warranted. Instead, he will make you blame for having hurt feelings in the first place.

  • You can’t help but feel, “I do everything for my husband, and he does nothing for me.”

Someone who is never wrong may have a sense of entitlement and expect that others should simply wait on them. This can lead you to feel as if your husband takes you for granted and relies on you to do everything for him while giving little in return.

  • He has a really hard time apologizing

The never in the wrong husband will struggle to apologize because offering an apology means admitting to wrongdoing. If you’re someone who feels that my husband thinks he is always right, you probably don’t get a sincere apology very often, if ever.

  • He stops texting mid-conversation during arguments

When you’re caught in the middle of a dilemma where my husband thinks he does nothing wrong, you might notice that he stops texting during an argument. Perhaps the two of you have been going back and forth, and he suddenly disappears during the conversation.

This suggests that he has become uncomfortable with the possibility that he might have done something wrong, so he has chosen to exit the conversation rather than address the issue.

  • You feel that he judges you for your flaws

How to Deal With a Husband Who Thinks He Does Nothing Wrong (3)

Remember that a never in the wrong husband typically has underlying insecurities and self-esteem issues. This means that he may be especially judgmental toward your flaws in order to avoid addressing his own imperfections.

  • He often corrects you

Another sign of a husband who thinks he does nothing wrong is constantly feeling like, “my husband is always correcting me. If your husband needs to be right and feels that he always is, this will mean that he thinks you are often wrong and in need of correction.

  • He threatens to leave you if he isn’t getting his way

Someone who always needs to be right may threaten to end the relationship in order to manipulate you into giving him his way or conceding to him during an argument.

Someone who is never wrong will expect that they should always have their way, and they may be willing to manipulate or shame you into giving them their way.

The video below discusses how partners might use threats as a bargaining tool to bend things their way and what you can do about it:

How to Deal With a Husband Who Thinks He Does Nothing Wrong (4)

  • He expects things to be done a certain way

Remember that if you’re in a situation where my husband thinks he does nothing wrong, he is probably a bit of a perfectionist. Along with this comes the expectation or belief that things should be done a certain way.

  • He’s rigid in his thinking

Rigid or black-and-white thinking can also come along with perfectionism and the never-wrong personality. Someone who has to always be right will be set on a certain way of thinking.

  • He doesn’t consider your perspective

If your husband thinks he is always right, he won’t want to consider your perspective. He is already convinced that his way of thinking is correct, so he has no motivation to consider a different viewpoint.

Acknowledging that your perspective may be valid would also threaten his own sense of security.

  • He becomes very angry when confronted with a mistake

People who are secure and have a healthy level of self-esteem are able to admit to mistakes and grow from them, as they see mistakes as a learning opportunity.

On the other hand, the never wrong personality views mistakes as a threat to their self-esteem, so they will become quite upset or display intense mood swings when confronted with a mistake they have made.

  • He is highly critical of you

Someone who is insecure about his own shortcomings may need to become highly critical of others in order to make himself feel better.

This means that when you are dealing with a never-in-the-wrong husband, he may criticize or demean you for making small mistakes or being imperfect.

Also Try: Does My Husband Take Me for Granted Quiz

How to deal with a husband who thinks he does nothing wrong?

So what do you do when you notice the signs that my husband thinks he does nothing wrong?

  • Know it’s not your fault

First of all, do not take the situation personally. You may think that your husband’s critical behavior or inability to apologize for means there is something wrong with you, but in reality, the problem begins with him.

He is coping with his own insecurities by being someone who is never wrong.

  • Do not tolerate abuse

While you may recognize that your husband’s need to be right is not your fault, that doesn’t mean that it is okay or that you should tolerate a marriage in which your opinion or value doesn’t matter.

Nor should you tolerate abusive behavior. If your husband’s need to be right all the time has become problematic for the relationship, you have a right to speak up and express your concerns.

  • Communicate

How to Deal With a Husband Who Thinks He Does Nothing Wrong (5)

When having a conversation, it can be helpful to first listen to your husband’s side of the story in order to validate his feelings. This can make him feel heard and understood, and it may lower some of his defenses.

After he has had a chance to talk, go ahead and express how you feel, using “I” statements.

For example, you may share, “I feel like you do not listen to my side of the story, and it makes me feel as if my opinion doesn’t matter to you, and I’m not important in this relationship.”

  • Create boundaries

You may also have to set a boundary with your husband.

Perhaps you can say, “If you become angry or critical and refuse to listen to my side of the story, I am going to have to leave the conversation until you are ready to be fair to me.”

  • Have empathy

Remember to address the conversation from a place of care and concern, and remain empathetic to your husband.

Offer him an opportunity to explain where his need to be right coming from, and remind him that you are having this conversation not because you want to “win the argument” but rather because you want to be on the same page so the relationship can be successful.

  • Visit a therapist

If having a conversation is not helpful, it may be beneficial to seek a couple’s counseling so that you can address underlying issues in the relationship.

Research shows that couple’s therapy can increase people’s empathy for their partners, so it may be beneficial when you feel that my husband thinks he knows everything.

  • Keep yourself busy

Find some sort of activity or outlet that allows you to be free from thoughts of, What is wrong with my husband?”

Living with a never-wrong personality can certainly come with challenges, so you may need to find your own outlets for stress. You may cope through exercise, meditation, journaling, and spending time with friends.

Conclusion

The realization that my husband thinks he does nothing wrong is frustrating, but there are ways to cope.

It is important to realize that this issue isn’t about you. If you are unhappy as a result of your husband’s need to always be right, have a conversation with him. Remember to take care of yourself as well.

How to Deal With a Husband Who Thinks He Does Nothing Wrong (2024)

FAQs

How to Deal With a Husband Who Thinks He Does Nothing Wrong? ›

He may be subconsciously trying to cover up his own insecurities, shame, or unpleasant emotions by trying to be right all the time. Underlying the never-wrong personality is low self-esteem and the fear that he will be seen as weak or inherently flawed if he admits to being wrong.

Why does my husband think he never does anything wrong? ›

He may be subconsciously trying to cover up his own insecurities, shame, or unpleasant emotions by trying to be right all the time. Underlying the never-wrong personality is low self-esteem and the fear that he will be seen as weak or inherently flawed if he admits to being wrong.

How do you deal with a husband who thinks he's always right? ›

How to Deal with Someone Who Always Needs to Be Right
  1. Don't take it personally. It's inevitable to feel like you're being attacked when talking to someone who's always right and to wonder if they're trying to push your buttons. ...
  2. Just walk away. ...
  3. Don't play the blame game. ...
  4. Focus on one issue at a time.

How do you deal with someone who thinks they do no wrong? ›

How To Deal With A Partner Who's NEVER Wrong
  1. Accept That the Root of That Is Pride. Or Insecurity. ...
  2. Avoid Personalizing Their Pride. Or Insecurity. ...
  3. Try to Deactivate Your “Need to Have the Last Word” Trigger. media.giphy.com. ...
  4. Present Things in Question Form. ...
  5. Get Off of the Eggshells. ...
  6. Create a Safe Haven for Them to Be Wrong.
Jul 6, 2020

What is emotional neglect in marriage? ›

In a marriage emotional neglect is when a spouse CONSISTENTLY fails to notice, attend to, and respond IN A TIMELY MANNER to a spouse's feelings. This has far-reaching negative consequences for the relationship.

What is a toxic husband like? ›

' Toxic, abusive partners don't want to take ownership (in situations where they objectively should) and will avoid doing so again and again. And, when they seem to take ownership, it's manipulative and over-the-top, with no change in behavior to support it,” she says.

Why would a husband Gaslight his wife? ›

A spouse may be unintentionally trying to control you, or they may just have unhealthy relationship patterns that result in gaslighting behaviors. Intentional or not, gaslighting is a destructive form of emotional abuse. It can have devastating long-term effects on one's self-esteem, relationships, and mental health.

Why does my husband find fault in everything I do? ›

If your partner is blaming you for everything, it means that they are unhappy with the relationship. Rather than talking through the problems in your marriage, they look out for a way to blame you for everything. Now is the time when you really would want to do something about it.

What is stonewalling in a relationship? ›

What does it mean to stonewall someone? In simple terms, stonewalling is when someone completely shuts down in a conversation or is refusing to communicate with another person.

What is a narcissistic husband? ›

A narcissistic spouse is typically manipulative, self-centered, difficult to feel connected to, and may be verbally aggressive or abusive.

What do you call someone who never admits they are wrong? ›

Stubborn is a disapproving word. She's so stubborn, she'll never admit that she was wrong. He was a stubborn child who threw a tantrum when he didn't get what he wanted. If someone is being very stubborn, you can say that they are as stubborn as a mule or that they or their actions are mulish.

What is a person who thinks they are always right? ›

narcissistic Add to list Share.

What is the walkaway wife syndrome? ›

There's a term for this: walkaway wife syndrome. This term is sometimes used to describe instances where a spouse – often the wife – has felt alone, neglected, and resentful in a deteriorating marriage and decides it's time to end it.

How do you know your husband doesn't value you? ›

He is no longer affectionate with you, physically or verbally. He no longer makes sweet or romantic gestures toward you. He doesn't say "I love you" anymore. He still says "I love you," but something about it feels hollow or forced, like he's just going through the motions.

What are the signs of unhappy marriage? ›

  • You Hardly Communicate Anymore.
  • There is Little to No Intimacy.
  • You Would Rather Spend Time With Your Friends Than be at Home With Your Partner.
  • Everything They Do Irritates You.
  • There is Emotional Withdrawal.
  • Both of you Have Differing Values, Beliefs, and Goals.
  • There's Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling.
Jun 4, 2023

What does spousal neglect look like? ›

Signs of Emotional Neglect

Your partner shuts down when you want to talk. You're not sure what your partner wants from you. You don't engage in social activities as a couple. Your go-to person is a friend, not your partner.

What does emotional invalidation look like? ›

Emotional invalidation can look like blaming, name calling, and problem-solving before understanding the other person's experience. Playing down another person's experience is another way to invalidate.

What is the lonely housewife syndrome? ›

Walkaway wife syndrome is a colloquial expression to describe someone who leaves a marriage because they are unhappy and can no longer stay in the relationship. It is also sometimes referred to as 'sudden divorce syndrome' or 'neglected wife syndrome.

Which is the most toxic emotion between married couples? ›

The research found that couples who are contemptuous of each other are more likely to suffer from infectious illness (colds, the flu, etc.) than couples who are not contemptuous. Contempt is the most poisonous of all relationship killers. We cannot emphasize that enough.

How do you tolerate a bad husband? ›

To deal with a negative spouse, you can:
  1. Practice empathy.
  2. Be forgiving.
  3. Set boundaries.
  4. Engage in self-care.
  5. Seek social support outside of your spouse.
May 18, 2022

How do you know if you have a bad husband? ›

What are the signs of a toxic marriage?
  • No. 1: Your spouse insists on controlling the finances and you. ...
  • No. 2: Chronic, escalating substance abuse. ...
  • No. 3: Physical and/or emotional abuse. ...
  • No. 4: Other forms of bad behavior. ...
  • No. 5: Struggles with mental health issues.
Nov 4, 2021

What is a gaslighter husband? ›

Gaslighting is a term taken from a 1938 play entitled Gas Light. In the play, a husband tries to make his wife think she is losing her mind. He does many things to make his wife doubt her own senses and reality, including turning down the gas lights at their home.

How to outsmart a gaslighter husband? ›

Here are eight tips for responding and taking back control.
  1. First, make sure it's gaslighting. ...
  2. Take some space from the situation. ...
  3. Collect evidence. ...
  4. Speak up about the behavior. ...
  5. Remain confident in your version of events. ...
  6. Focus on self-care. ...
  7. Involve others. ...
  8. Seek professional support.

Why does my husband always turn the blame on me? ›

9 reasons your partner or spouse blames you for everything.

They're emotionally abusive when they always blame you. They want to protect themselves. They're insecure, have low self-esteem and admitting to being wrong is too scary for them. They want to defend themselves.

Why does my husband turns every argument around on me? ›

Your husband or partner may turn everything around on you because he feels insecure. It may not seem like it but many blame-shifters often have low self-esteem. So, to feel better about himself, your husband puts you down and makes you feel like you're not good enough.

What is it called when someone turns everything around on you? ›

They turn the story around to make it seem like you are at fault, deflecting attention and blame away from them to make you feel guilty. This type of emotional manipulation is called gaslighting. [clickToTweet tweet=”“Am I going crazy? Am I being too sensitive?

What is a backburner relationship? ›

According to the study, a back-burner is “a person to whom one is not presently committed, and with whom one maintains some degree of communication in order to keep or establish the possibility of future romantic and/or sexual involvement”.

What are the 4 horsem*n of marriage? ›

The Four Horsem*n are four communication habits that increase the likelihood of divorce, according to research by psychologist and renowned marriage researcher John Gottman, Ph. D. Those four behaviors are criticism, defensiveness, stonewalling, and contempt.

What are the four horsem*n in marriage? ›

The Four Horsem*n: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling.

How does a narcissist husband treat his wife? ›

Somatic & Cerebral Narcissists

Narcissists are misogynists. They hold women in contempt, they loathe and fear them. They seek to torment and frustrate them (either by debasing them sexually – or by withholding sex from them). They harbor ambiguous feelings towards the sexual act.

What are the 5 main habits of a narcissist? ›

Common Narcissist Characteristics
  • Inflated Ego.
  • Lack of Empathy.
  • Need for Attention.
  • Repressed Insecurities.
  • Few Boundaries.

What is the GREY rock method? ›

The grey rock method is where you deliberately act unresponsive or unengaged so that an abusive person will lose interest in you. Abusive people thrive on emotions and drama. When you act indifferent and don't show your emotions, they may lose interest and stop bothering you. This is known as “grey rocking.”

What is it called when someone always thinks they did something wrong? ›

Paranoia is the irrational and persistent feeling that people are 'out to get you'. The three main types of paranoia include paranoid personality disorder, delusional (formerly paranoid) disorder and paranoid schizophrenia.

What do you call someone who sees the negative in everything? ›

Pessimistic describes the state of mind of someone who always expects the worst. A pessimistic attitude isn't very hopeful, shows little optimism, and can be a downer for everyone else.

What do you call a person who doesn't change their mind? ›

An inexorable person is hard-headed and cannot be convinced to change their mind, no matter what.

What mental disorder makes people think they are always right? ›

Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a long-term, mental health condition.

What do you call someone who thinks only their opinion matters? ›

Someone who is selfish cares only about themselves and doesn't consider others.

What is a word for someone who thinks they know everything? ›

Omniscient Definition & Meaning - Merriam-Webster.

What is the first wife syndrome? ›

Al-Sherbiny [41] reported the “first wife syndrome,” where the first wife reported difficulties faced psychological, physical, and social problems among women in a polygamous marriage.

What is superior wife syndrome? ›

The author, Carin Rubenstein, has discovered that millions of wives think they do everything better than their husbands. They feel they are more responsible, more capable, and, in a word, superior.

What does contempt look like in a marriage? ›

About Contempt

It can take the form of verbal or non-verbal language, which can include sarcasm, mockery, and facial gestures. Often, partners are unaware of what they said or did, especially contemptuous gestures like an eye roll or chuckle that elicited their partner's wrath.

What is emotional abandonment in marriage? ›

In the context of a marriage, the feelings of neglect, being left out, and not being heard are collectively referred to as emotional abandonment. It occurs when one partner is so preoccupied with their own concerns that they are unable to notice the struggles, concerns, or problems their partner is experiencing.

What signs to look for if your husband is cheating? ›

  • They're reluctant to make any big joint purchases.
  • They "forgot" to mention a night out.
  • The phone goes everywhere with them—even the bathroom.
  • And, they're constantly texting.
  • When you talk, they rock back and forth.
  • They're more focused on their appearance.
  • They overshare.
  • They're always on social media.
Jul 23, 2021

What are the red flags in a marriage? ›

Red flags in a relationship include excessive jealousy and frequent lying. You should also be wary of a partner who frequently criticizes you or puts you down. Another major red flag is an unwillingness to compromise — relationships shouldn't be one-sided.

How long is too long to be unhappy in a marriage? ›

Most couples wait an average of six years before seeking help. There's an important question you both need to answer if you are facing an ongoing unhappy marriage or divorce. Are you motivated to save your marriage? If so, are you willing to do whatever it takes?

When it's time to leave your husband? ›

Not seeing a future together. Feeling unsure whether you still love each other. No longer feeling happy, excited, or full of joy when you're together. Feeling bored or irritated around each other.

What is a person who never thinks they are wrong? ›

A narcissist is never sorry because he (or she) perceives himself as perfect. He can't be wrong. He views himself as superior to everyone and, thus, always right.

Why does my husband think everything is his fault? ›

9 reasons your partner or spouse blames you for everything.

They have narcissistic tendencies. They're emotionally abusive when they always blame you. They want to protect themselves. They're insecure, have low self-esteem and admitting to being wrong is too scary for them.

How do you make your husband realize that he is wrong? ›

5 Ways on How to Make Him Realize He Made a Mistake
  1. Stay away a bit.
  2. Don't argue at all.
  3. Never ever talk about past experiences.
  4. Focus on yourself.
  5. Be the future you.
Jun 11, 2020

What is narcissistic stonewalling? ›

Narcissist Stonewalling

Stonewalling is the refusal to communicate with someone. This means that your spouse refuses to listen to you and your concerns. Stonewalling is one of the most prevalent narcissistic abuse techniques.

What are red flags of a narcissist? ›

Prioritizes their own needs over others. High expectations of their friends. Ends friendships when they no longer benefit them. Obsessed with social status.

Why is my husband so critical of everything I do? ›

Your critical husband or wife may be stressed or dealing with some uncomfortable emotions, and criticizing you helps to distract them from how they are feeling. In some cases, being overly critical may have just become a habit or a learned way of communicating with others.

How do you deal with an unacceptable husband's behavior? ›

Coping Strategies
  1. Recognize that you can't change your spouse. ...
  2. Try to focus on the positive. ...
  3. Reinforce positive behavior. ...
  4. Maintain eye contact when stating your opinions and feelings. ...
  5. Be straightforward and clear in your communications. ...
  6. Make time to be alone together. ...
  7. Don't place blame. ...
  8. Be honest with yourself.
Apr 8, 2021

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